Losers

While playing little league, I once received some sage advice my father. I had just made the last out of the game by striking out with the tying run on third. Down and dejected, my dad patted my head and said “Son, there are no losers. Everyone is a winner for just going out there and giving it their best.”

As a solitary tear rolled down my check, I looked up to him and replied “Really?”

“No! I’m just kidding. There are losers. And today you are one of them. But the world needs losers so we know who the winners are.”

I am taking that great (and psychology scaring) advice to heart this year with my annual NFL football picks.

Everyone is so focused on picking the winners, but not me. This year I am going to shine a well deserved light on those underappreciated (yet significantly well paid) participants in every football game, the losing team.

Let those other so called experts give you the lock solid winner. Not me. This year, I will be giving you all the losing teams each week. Take that Berman and the dead ferret under your nose.

This season's very first loser! The Minnesota Vikings. Give Favre and the Vikings the 4 points and all the lubricant shots they can handle. It still will not be enough to overcome a crowd still drunk from the last Super Bowl. I don’t mean drunk on excitement, I literally mean their collective BAC is still at .21.

Now, let's get this football season started! The Vegas economy needs all the help those losing football parlay bets can give it!