Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Five things about tonight’s Titans/Steelers Game

1. Lendale White claims he stopped drinking tequila this off season in order to get in shape. I liked my sports heroes better when getting drunk was part of their “in-season conditioning” (see Mantle, Ruth, Wells, Strawberry). Although being drunk would explain a lot about some of his past actions, especially running right into the ground on the infamous 4 and 1 against Texas in the Rose Bowl.

2. James Harrison did not go to the White House with the rest of the team this year because, and I quote, “This is how I feel -- if you want to see the Pittsburgh Steelers, invite us when we don't win the Super Bowl. As far as I'm concerned, he [Obama] would've invited Arizona if they had won." Think about a man whose brain could come up with the logic. Now think of that man in the general population without football as an outlet. Thank god for the NFL.

3. In the upcoming season of House, Mike Tomlin will guest star as Dr. Foreman’s (Omar Epps) twin brother. He visits the hospital to rub in the fact that flunking out of med school and becoming a pro football coach was the best thing that ever happened to him. Things take a turn for the worse though, when Tomlin contracts a rare yet deadly disease caused by blending Gatorade with the material found in a parka. He lives after House recalls treating Mike Holmgren for the same thing several years earlier.

4. Vince Young claims he will be the next black quarterback to win the Super Bowl. He also claims he will be the next black quarterback to land on the moon, the next black quarterback to become President of the United States, and the next black quarterback to win the Pulitzer Prize. Unfortunately for him, he will not be the next black quarterback for the Tennessee Titans.

5. Since the NFL scheduled the Super Bowl champs to host the opening Thursday night game, the defending champs have yet to lose (5-0). Who am I to buck a trend? The Steelers will win and cover the 6 point spread.

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